Monthly Archives: June 2012

14 RULES FOR BEING YOU

Get your priorities straight. – Twenty years from now it won’t really matter what shoes you wore today, how your hair looked, or what brand of jeans you bought. What will matter is how you loved, what you learned and how you applied this knowledge.

Take full responsibility for your goals. – If you really want good things in your life to happen, you have to make them happen yourself. You can’t sit around and hope that somebody else will help you; you have to make your own future and not think that your destiny is tied to the actions and choices of others. Read Quitter.

Know your worth. – When someone treats you like you’re just one of many options, help them narrow their choice by removing yourself fromthe equation. Sometimes you have to try not to care, no matter how much you do. Because sometimes you can mean almost nothing to someone who means so much to you. It’s not pride – it’s self-respect. Don’t expect to see positive changes in your life if you surround yourself with negative people. Don’t give part-time people a full-time position in your life. Know your value and what you have to offer, and never settle for anything less than what you deserve.

Choose the right perspective. – Perspective is everything. When faced with long check-out lines, traffic jams, or waiting an hour past your appointment time, you have two choices: You can get frustrated and enraged, or you can view it as life’s way of giving you a guilt-free breather from rushing, and spend that time daydreaming, conversing, or watching the clouds. The first choice will raise your blood pressure. The second choice will raise your consciousness.

Don’t let your old problems punish your dreams. – Learn to let go of things you can’t control. The next time you’re tempted to rant about a situation that you think ended unfairly, remind yourself of this: You’ll never kill off your anger by beating the story to death. So close your mouth, unclench your fists, and redirect your thoughts. When left untended, the anger will slowly wither, and you’ll be left to live in peace as you grow toward a better future.

Choose the things that truly matter. – Some things just don’t matter much – like the kind of car you drive. How big of a deal is that in the grand scheme of life? Not a big at all. But lifting a person’s heart? Now, that matters. The whole problem with most people is, they KNOW what matters, but they don’t CHOOSE it. They get distracted. They don’t put first things first. The hardest and smartest way to live is choosing what truly matters, and pursuing it passionately. Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.

Love YOU. – Let someone love you just the way you are – as flawed as you might be, as unattractive as you sometimes feel, and as unaccomplished as you think you are. Yes, let someone love you despite all of this; and let that someone be YOU.

Accept your strengths and weaknesses. – Be confident being YOU. We often waste too much time comparing ourselves to others, and wishing to be something we’re not. Everybody has their own strengths and weaknesses, and it is only when we accept everything we are, and aren’t, that we are able to become who we are capable of being.

Stand up for YOU. – You were born to be real, not to be perfect. You’re here to be YOU, not to be what someone else wants you to be. Stand up for yourself, look them in the eye, and say, “Don’t judge me until you know me, don’t underestimate me until you challenge me, and don’t talk about me until you’ve talked to me.”

Learn from others, and move on when you must. – You can’t expect to change people. Either you accept who they are, or you start living your life without them. And just because something ends, doesn’t mean it never should have been. You lived, you learned, you grew, and you moved on. Some people come into your life as blessings; others come into your life as lessons.

Be honest in your relationships. – Don’t cheat! If you’re not happy, be honest, and move on if you must. When you’re truly in love, being faithful isn’t a sacrifice, it’s a joy.

Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. – Life as we know it can change in a blink of an eye. Unlikely friendships can blossom, important careers can be tossed aside and a long lost hope can be rekindled. It might feel a little uncomfortable at times, but know that life begins at the end of your comfort zone. So if you’re feeling uncomfortable right now, know that the change taking place in your life is not an ending, but a new beginning. Read The Power of Full Engagement.

Be who you were born to be. – Don’t get to the end of your life and find that you lived only the length of it; live the width of it as well. When it comes to living as a passionate, inspired human being, the only challenge greater than learning to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes, is learning to walk a lifetime comfortably in your own. Follow your heart, and take your brain with you. When you are truly comfortable in your own skin, not everyone will like you, but you won’t care about it one bit.

Never give up on YOU. – This is your life; shape it, or someone else will. Strength shows not only in the ability to hold on, but in the ability to start over when you must. It is never too late to become what you might have been. Keep learning, adapting, and growing. You may not be there yet, but you are closer than you were yesterday.

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60 Quotes that Will Change the Way You Think

  1. You cannot change what you refuse to confront.
  2. Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.
  3. Don’t think of cost.  Think of value.
  4. Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.
  5. Too many people buy things they don’t need with money they don’t have to impress people they don’t know.  Read Rich Dad, Poor Dad.
  6. No matter how many mistakes you make or how slow you progress, you are still way ahead of everyone who isn’t trying.
  7. If a person wants to be a part of your life, they will make an obvious effort to do so.  Think twice before reserving a space in your heart for people who do not make an effort to stay.
  8. Making one person smile can change the world – maybe not the whole world, but their world.
  9. Saying someone is ugly doesn’t make you any prettier.
  10. The only normal people you know are the ones you don’t know very well.
  11. Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you react to it.
  12. The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too.
  13. It’s better to be alone than to be in bad company.
  14. As we grow up, we realize it becomes less important to have more friends and more important to have real ones.
  15. Making a hundred friends is not a miracle.  The miracle is to make a single friend who will stand by your side even when hundreds are against you.
  16. Giving up doesn’t always mean you’re weak, sometimes it means you are strong enough and smart enough to let go and move on.
  17. Don’t say you don’t have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michaelangelo, Mother Teresea, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, Albert Einstein, etc…
  18. If you really want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse.
  19. Don’t choose the one who is beautiful to the world; choose the one who makes your world beautiful.
  20. Falling in love is not a choice.  To stay in love is.
  21. True love isn’t about being inseparable; it’s about two people being true to each other even when they are separated.
  22. While you’re busy looking for the perfect person, you’ll probably miss the imperfect person who could make you perfectly happy.
  23. Never do something permanently foolish just because you are temporarily upset.
  24. You can learn great things from your mistakes when you aren’t busy denying them.  Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
  25. In life, if you don’t risk anything, you risk everything.
  26. When you stop chasing the wrong things you give the right things a chance to catch you.
  27. Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
  28. There isn’t anything noble about being superior to another person.  True nobility is in being superior to the person you once were.
  29. Trying to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.
  30. You will never become who you want to be if you keep blaming everyone else for who you are now.
  31. People are more what they hide than what they show.
  32. Sometimes people don’t notice the things others do for them until they stop doing them.
  33. Don’t listen to what people say, watch what they do.
  34. Being alone does not mean you are lonely, and being lonely does not mean you are alone.
  35. Love is not about sex, going on fancy dates, or showing off.  It’s about being with a person who makes you happy in a way nobody else can.
  36. Anyone can come into your life and say how much they love you.  It takes someone really special to stay in your life and show how much they love you.
  37. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie.  Don’t save it for a special occasion; today is special.
  38. Love and appreciate your parents.  We are often so busy growing up, we forget they are also growing old.
  39. When you have to start compromising yourself and your morals for the people around you, it’s probably time to change the people around you.
  40. Learn to love yourself first, instead of loving the idea of other people loving you.
  41. When someone tells you, “You’ve changed,” it might simply be because you’ve stopped living your life their way.
  42. Someone else doesn’t have to be wrong for you to be right.
  43. Be happy.  Be yourself.  If others don’t like it, then let them be.  Happiness is a choice.  Life isn’t about pleasing everybody.
  44. When you’re up, your friends know who you are.  When you’re down, you know who your friends are.
  45. Don’t look for someone who will solve all your problems; look for someone who will face them with you.
  46. If you expect the world to be fair with you because you are fair, you’re fooling yourself. That’s like expecting the lion not to eat you because you didn’t eat him.
  47. No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life.  Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs.
  48. The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the grandest intention.
  49. Many people are so poor because the only thing they have is money.
  50. Learn to appreciate the things you have before time forces you appreciate the things you once had.
  51. When you choose to see the good in others, you end up finding the good in yourself.
  52. You don’t drown by falling in the water.  You drown by staying there.
  53. It’s better to know and be disappointed than to never know and always wonder.
  54. There are things that we don’t want to happen but have to accept, things we don’t want to know but have to learn, and people we can’t live without but have to let go.
  55. Happiness is not determined by what’s happening around you, but rather what’s happening inside you.  Most people depend on others to gain happiness, but the truth is, it always comes from within.
  56. If you tell the truth, it becomes a part of your past.  If you lie, it becomes a part of your future.
  57. What you do every day matters more than what you do every once in a while.  Read The Power of Habit.
  58. You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.
  59. Things turn out best for people who make the best out of the way things turn out.
  60. If you don’t like something, change it.  If you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.

source: http://www.marcandangel.com/2012/06/08/60-quotes-change-the-way-you-think/#more-461


50 simple ways to make someone feel special

  1. Make a note of the important events in her life and ask her how the events went.
  2. Give her a specific and genuine compliment.
  3. Praise her in front of other people.
  4. In a group setting, ask her to tell her favorite story.
  5. If she’s telling a story to a group and she gets cut off for some reason, be the first person to ask her to continue telling it.
  6. Ignore her tiredness. Nobody wants to be told that they have dark rings under their eyes or that they look like they just woke up.
  7. After meeting someone new, follow up the next day with an email or handwritten note.
  8. When you first call her on the phone, ask if it’s a good time for her to talk.
  9. If, while talking on the phone, you hear something going on in the background, ask her if she needs to attend to it.
  10. Don’t multi-task while you’re on the phone. She’ll be able to tell.
  11. Send her a link to an article that you think would interest her.
  12. Write her a thank-you note.
  13. Connect her with someone else you know who might be able to help her.
  14. Wait for a full second or two before replying to something she says. This shows that your response is a thoughtful one.
  15. Don’t play with your cell phone while you’re with her. At the very least, put your phone on the table with the screen facing down.
  16. If you’re working at your laptop when she comes to talk to you, close your laptop. If you can’t do that for some reason, at least make it clear that she has your undivided attention.
  17. Buy her a gift for no apparent reason.
  18. Write a blog post and dedicate it to her.
  19. When she’s explaining her problem to you, listen intently without offering any solutions or advice.
  20. Never tell her that she “shouldn’t feel that way.” This invalidates her feelings.
  21. Give her a big smile when you see her. Show her that her presence makes your day.
  22. Tell her “Good job!” when she does something well.
  23. Tell her you’re proud of her.
  24. Ask her to teach you something.
  25. Remember the names of the people close to her.
  26. Ask her for advice or for her opinion.
  27. Brag about her even when she isn’t there. Word will get around.
  28. Never say “I told you so.”
  29. When you’ve made a mistake, admit it immediately.
  30. When she asks you about your day, provide some details.
  31. Call if you’re going to be late to meet her.
  32. Don’t compare her with anyone else, especially not to her face.
  33. Ask about her family.
  34. Ask her how she feels about an event or situation.
  35. Tell her that you believe in her.
  36. Notice when she changes something about her physical appearance.
  37. Include her in a group conversation.
  38. If there’s an inside joke that she doesn’t understand, explain it to her.
  39. When she’s right about something, let her know.
  40. Don’t give her any advice unless she specifically asks for it.
  41. Ask her open-ended questions.
  42. Ask her about her dreams.
  43. Share your dreams with her.
  44. Share your fears and insecurities with her.
  45. Never say “I understand exactly how you feel.” You don’t.
  46. Don’t judge her dreams, ideas or opinions.
  47. When you introduce her, say something kind about her accomplishments and about your friendship.
  48. Tell her how she has made a difference in your life.
  49. Bring up a unique shared memory.
  50. Celebrate her successes.

source: http://thinksimplenow.com/happiness/make-others-feel-special/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+ThinkSimple+%28Think+Simple+Now%29


Top 5 Traits

Top 5 Character Traits

84%
1. Faithfulness

More than 8 out of 10 women rated “faithful to me” in the top 10 attributes they find sexy in a man. A woman’s tendency toward attachment is a biological imperative, a matter of raising offspring right. Reassure her (often) that you’re not going anywhere.

75%
2. Dependability

Three out of four women say they look for a man who makes commitments and follows through. Being responsible—even if it’s just remembering to pick up salad dressing on your way over to her place—sends a positive signal that someday you might commit.

67%
3. Kindness

Young women may still fall for the bad-boy type, but more-mature women are turned on by kindness, because kindness inspires confidence. In other words, if you treat the waitress well, your date figures you’ll treat her well, too.

66%
4. Moral Integrity

Having the guts to tell the truth means to a woman that you have the guts to be a good, caring, decent partner over the long haul. White lies are okay; just avoid any that are tinged with gray.

51%
5. Fatherliness

Being a good dad (or having the potential to become one) is about being a good role model—and about being patient and caring, qualities women like in a partner. If you’re not a father, then tell her about your favorite niece or nephew, or the employee you’re mentoring at work.

Top 5 Personality Traits

77%
1. Sense of Humor

Being able to laugh at the stresses of this world is a must, according to the women on our panel. You get bonus points if you can make them laugh. Humor tells a woman that you can laugh at—read, handle easily—the many difficulties that life throws at you.

55%
2. Intelligence

A worldy, interesting man is a man she likes to show off. Men who are take-charge problem solvers make women feel secure, and men who are always improving are never boring.

46%
3. Passion

Why have women always melted for musicians? Because rock stars are passionate in public. Women like displays of passion because they’re not accustomed to seeing them from men. Get passionate about something: kayaking, impressionistic art, barbecuing, or Habitat for Humanity. It’s proof that you care for and about something beyond yourself.

41%
4. Confidence

A man who feels secure in his own skin makes the woman he’s with feel secure. By showing you can handle unfamiliar people or situations, you tell the woman in your life that she need not fear, either.

38%
5. Generosity

This is more important to women over 35 than it is to those under that age. Generosity, however, doesn’t just mean springing for dinner at a four-star. Your willingness to give your time and lend your ear is what women crave.

Top 5 Practical Skills

53%
1. Listening

Pay attention. A woman feels safe and secure when she knows her man will put down his BlackBerry and listen to her. Magic words: “I’m here. Tell me everything.”

48%
2. Romancing

Romance appeals to a woman’s right-brained, less-logical side. Every woman fantasizes about being swept off her feet. Romance is bold because you’re displaying your desire for a woman and revealing a softer, more vulnerable side that women find irresistible.

35%
3. Being Good in Bed

It’s not just the orgasms. A woman knows that a man who takes care of her in bed will take care of her out of bed. (Of course, the orgasms don’t hurt.) Your enthusiasm for her body is more important than your sexual prowess.

23%
4. Cooking, Cleaning, etc.

Self-sufficiency means you’re not going to expect her to be like your mother. Learn how to make one or two killer breakfasts or dinners, and you’ll win her heart.

21%
5. Earning Potential

One in five women surveyed said a man’s successfulness in his career contributes to his sexiness. If you’ve demonstrated talent, goal achievement, and follow-through, you give women confidence that you will be a good provider.

Top 5 Physical Attributes

30%
1. Sense of Style

The way you dress reflects on the woman you’re with, and she knows it. The man who knows how to match a patterned shirt and tie will notice when she’s dressed well, too. (And maybe he’ll pay for the Blahniks.) Keep your tailor and your dry cleaner busy, and spring for posh, touchable fabrics like cashmere, suede, pima cotton, and brushed corduroy.

26%
2. Handsome Face

The science of attraction, which has been studied ad infinitum, says it’s all about symmetry. Imagine you have a dotted red line (Nip/Tuck style) vertically through the center of your face, down your nose. Are your features similar in form and arrangement on both sides of the line? Do your eyes and ears match up? The closer one side mirrors the other, the more attractive you are. Women in cross-cultural studies have also ranked men with broad chins, high cheekbones, and large eyes as the most attractive. Best way to improve your looks: Smile more, and make certain your sideburns are even.

15%
3. Height

Tall, dark, and handsome isn’t the be-all and end-all. Women say they like feeling smaller than their men, but height doesn’t necessarily mean might. They will feel comfortable as long as they aren’t towering over you.

13%
4. Muscular Build

Spend more time with the bathroom mirror and less time with the gym mirror. Nearly three times as many women value a clean-shaven face over the clean and jerk. Muscles help ward off rivals and assure a woman that you won’t drop her during a dip, but your overall appearance is more important than the size of your biceps.

12%
5. Fitness

Women recognize a good body as indicative of a man of discipline and self-control. It tells a woman you can keep up with her, in bed and out.

Source: Men’s Health


10 Mistakes Unhappy People Make

A person does not have to be behind bars to be a prisoner.  People can be prisoners of their own concepts, choices and ideas.  So tell the negativity committee that meets inside your head to sit down and shut up.

When you dream, you better dream big; when you think, you better think big; and when you love, you better love truthfully.  Happiness is a choice.  There are no excuses for not trying to make the very best out of your life.  There are no excuses for living in a way that consistently makes you unhappy.

Here are ten happiness mistakes to avoid:

  1. Thinking that you have already missed your chance. – Your life, with all its ups and downs, has molded you for the greater good.  Your life has been exactly what it needed to be.  Don’t think you’ve lost time.  It took each and every situation you have encountered to bring you to the current moment.  And every moment of your life, including this one right now, is a fresh start.  If you have the courage to admit when you’re scared, the ability to laugh even as you cry, the nerve to speak up even if your voice is shaking, the confidence to ask for help when you need it, and the wisdom to take it when it’s offered, then you have everything you need to get yourself to a better place.  Read The Power of Habit.
  2. Using failed relationships as an excuse. – Life doesn’t always introduce you to the people you WANT to meet.  Sometimes life puts you in touch with the people you NEED to meet – to help you, to hurt you, to leave you, to love you, and to gradually strengthen you into the person you were meant to become.
  3. Changing who you are to satisfy others. – No matter how loud their opinions are, others cannot choose who you are.  The question should not be, “Why don’t they like me when I’m being me?” It should be, “Why am I wasting my time worrying what they think of me?”  If you are not hurting anyone with your actions, keep moving forward with your life.  Be happy.  Be yourself.  If others don’t like it, then let them be.  Life isn’t about pleasing everybody.
  4. Putting up with negative people and negative thinking. – It’s time to walk away from all the drama and the people who create it.  Surround yourself with those who make you smile.  Love the people who treat you right, and pray for the ones who don’t.  Forget the negative and focus on the positive.  Life is too short to be anything but happy.  Making mistakes and falling down is a part of life, but getting back up and moving on is what LIVING is all about.
  5. Focusing all of your attention on another time and place. – This day will never happen again.  Enjoy it.  Cherish your time.  It’s often hard to tell the true value of a moment until it becomes a memory.  Someday you may discover that the small things were really the big things.  So learn to appreciate what you have before time forces you appreciate what you once had.  Read The Power of Now.
  6. Overlooking what you have to focus on what you haven’t. – Most people end up cheating on others and themselves because they pay more attention to what they’re missing, rather than what they have.  Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, think about what you have that everyone else is missing.
  7. Dwelling on the things you can’t change. – If you hadn’t fallen down, you would never have learned how to get back on your feet.  If you hadn’t been forced to let go and move on, you’d never have learned that you have the strength to stand on your own.  If you hadn’t lost hope, you would never have found your faith.  The best often comes after the worst happens.  You can either move on, or you can dwell on the things you can’t change.  Either way life does move on with or without you.  So learn from the past and then get the heck out of there.  You will always grow stronger from the pain if you don’t let it destroy you.
  8. Constantly sacrificing your own happiness for everyone else. – Never let your own happiness wither away as you try to bring sunshine to others.  Life is not about making others happy.  Life is about being honest and sharing your happiness with them.
  9. Losing track of your own goals and ideals. – Knowing who you are is one thing, but truly believing and living as yourself is another.  With all the social conditioning in our society we sometimes forget to stay true to ourselves.  Don’t lose yourself out there.  In this crazy world that’s trying to make you like everyone else, stay true to your awesome self.  Read The Art of Non-Conformity.
  10. Dealing with the stress of deceiving others. – If you say you’re going to do something, DO IT!  If you say you’re going to be somewhere, BE THERE!  If you say you feel something, MEAN IT!  If you can’t, won’t, and don’t, then DON’T LIE.  It’s always better to tell people the truth up front.  Live in such a way that if someone decided to attack your character, no one would believe it.  Live so that when the people around you think of fairness, caring and integrity, they think of you.

And remember, life will never be perfect, no matter how hard you try.  Even if you pour your heart and soul into it, you will never achieve a state of absolute perfection.  There will always be moments of uncertainty; there will always be days where nothing goes right.  But as time rolls on you will learn that even the most imperfect situations can be made better with a little love and laughter.

source: http://www.marcandangel.com/2012/05/28/10-mistakes-unhappy-people-make/